Funny Gay Bar Jokes for Adults Quotes
Now, these are just darn funny. And maybe slightly NSFW. You've been warned! Thanks to the knee-slapping people over at Jokes4Us, we discovered a plethora of gay jokes that made us laugh, cringe, and roll our eyes. Hard.
But, it's April Fool's Day, so go on – have a good chuckle:
Q: How do 5 gay men walk?
One Direction
Q: What do you call a gay drive by?
A fruit roll up.
Q: Why can't gays drive faster than 68mph?
Because at 69 they blow a rod.
Q: What do you call a gay cowboy?
A Jolly Rancher
Q: Why are most politicians in the closet or gay?
Because they can only mandate.
Q: How do you fit three homosexuals on one barstool?
Turn it upside-down
Q: What do you call a homosexual dentist?
Tooth fairy
Q: Did you hear about the gay guy who got kicked off the golf course?
He was playing with too many strokes.
Q: Why is Katie Holmes divorcing Tom Cruise?
Apparently, he's been in A Few Good Men.
Q: What comes after 69 for gay men?
Mouthwash.
Q: What did one gay sperm say to another?
How do we find an egg in all of this shit?
Q: What do you call an annoying gay man?
A pain in the arse.
Q. Hear about the new gay sitcom?
"Leave it, it's Beaver."
Q: Whats a homos favorite planet?
Uranus
Q: What do you call a gay boxer?
Fruit Punch!
Q: What did the moose say after leaving the gay bar?
Man, I blew like 50 bucks in there.
Q: What do you call a gay Ginger?
Flaming.
Q: How do you know you're a homosexual?
When you make Justin Bieber look straight.
Q. Did you hear about the gay rabbit?
He found a hare up his ass.
Q: What do you call a bouncer in a gay bar?
Flame thrower.
Q: What do you call a 5-Man gay mariachi band?
Juan Direction
Q: What do you get when you cross an Eskimo and a gay guy?
A snowblower.
Q. How can you tell if a novel is homosexual?
The hero always gets his man in the end.
Q. How can you tell if a Western is gay?
All the good guys are hung.
Q: How does a gay guy fake an orgasm?
He spits on his back.
Q: How do you say homosexual in Jewish?
A heblew.
Q: What will the first gay Transformer turn into?
A Prius.
Q: What does one gay say to another homo sitting at the bar?
Do you mind if I push in your stool?
Q: What do you call a phone that gay men can't use?
A Homophone.
Q: What is Gay Pride?
A group of homosexual lions.
Q: Did you hear about the gay vegetarian?
He still eats meat.
Q: Why don't gays shop at Sports Authority?
Because they prefer Dick's.
Q: What does a homo say to another gay going on vacation?
Can I help you pack your shit?
Q: Did you hear about the homosexual electron?
Went around blowing fuses.
Q: Why is Fred Flinstone a closet homosexual?
He has a gay old time
Q: Did you hear about the homosexual letter?
Only came in male boxes.
Q: Why don't blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts?
Cause their balls show
Q. What do you call a gay dinosaur?
Mega-sore-ass
Q. Did you hear about the two homosexual judges?
They tried each other.
Q. Did you know 75% of the gay population were born that way?
The other 25% were sucked into it.
Q: What do you call a gay Jamaican guy?
Pokemon
Q: What do doctors prescribe for a sore asshole?
Bengay.
Q: What do gay men call hemorrhoids?
Speed bumps.
Q: What do you call two gay Irish men?
Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick.
Q: Did you hear about the two gay guys that had an argument in the bar?
They went outside to exchange blows.
Q: What does a gay horse eat?
HAAAAYYYYYYY.
Q. Did you hear about the gay truckers?
They exchanged loads.
Q: What's the difference between a hobo and a homo?
A hobo doesn't have any friends, but a homo has friends up the ass
Q. What's the biggest crime committed by transvestites?
Male fraud.
Q: What do you call a gay Chinese man?
Chui mi Wang
Q: Why was the gay embarrassed when he was caught blowing the well-hung black boy?
Because he was caught with a foot in his mouth.
Q: What do you call a gay insect with wings?
A fruit fly
Q: What's the motto of the Greek army?
Never leave your buddy's behind.
Q: Hear about the gay royal Canadian mounted cop?
He got so excited his first day on the Job he jumped on his whistle and blew his horse.
Q: What do you call a gay in a wheelchair?
A fruit roll-up.
Q: Why did the gay guy go straight?
There were too many dicks
Q: Did you hear about the 2 gays that got into a fight in a bar?
They were ejected for exchanging blows.
Q: What do you call a gay scientist?
A homo-geneous.
Q: What do you call a gay midget?
A lowblow
Q: What do you call a gay couple?
TOGAYTHER.
Q: Two gay guys were having sex when they both die at the same time. Who goes to heaven first?
The one who had his shit packed.
Q: What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools?
A fruit stand.
Q: What did the gay rooster say?ANYCOCKWILLDOO!
ANYCOCKWILLDOO!
Q: How do gay gangsters do a drive by?
They throw skittles at you and say "Taste the rainbow, bitches!"
Q: How many gay men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One… But it takes half the ER staff to get it out!
Me: I know a gay guy that sounds like an owl.
Friend: Who?
Got any of your own? LOL
Source: https://www.gayborhood.com/buzz/the-worst-gay-jokes-youll-ever-read/
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